#111: The Myth of the Lone Leader
Why real leadership starts with being human
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Hey Friends,
Welcome to the 111th edition of The Antifragile Leader.
Last week we baptized Zeno, so it was a weekend full of good time, spent with family and friends.
And a lot of rain.
It was a déjà vu from our wedding?
We both like sitting outside, and we wanted both moments to happen in a nice garden setting.
It poured when we got married.
And after a couple of weeks of sunny days in May, it rained the whole day last Saturday.
So, instead of sitting in the garden and enjoying a glass of wine during sunset,
We had to cram everyone inside.
Well, I still had fun, and I hope the guests had fun too.
Here are some photos from the event.
Now, to more serious stuff.
The Myth of the Lone Leader
Remember that viral video from the pandemic where Professor Robert Kelly was giving a live interview on BBC and suddenly his toddler marched in like she owned the place, followed by her baby sibling in a walker, and finally their panicked mom diving in to save the day?
If you don’t remember it, here it is:
After this interview, Kelly thought no one will ever invite him again for interviews.
But, the opposite happened, he started getting more invitates than ever.
Because the video showed the world what it’s all about.
A reminder that even in our most “professional” moments, we’re still human.
It was awkward. It was real. And it was unforgettable.
And yet, so many of us still live under the illusion that good leadership looks like perfection.
That you need to always have the answers, never show weakness, and certainly never let your kids crash a Zoom call.
We think a real leader sits high on a mountaintop, above the noise, above the messiness of life.
But the truth is that leader doesn’t exist.
That leader is a myth.
The best leaders I’ve met don’t hide their humanity. They embrace it.
They don’t pretend to be invincible.
They admit when they’re tired, confused, or overwhelmed.
Because antifragility doesn’t come from shielding yourself from chaos.
It comes from coping with it.
Marcus Aurelius didn’t write his Meditations from a luxury resort.
He wrote them while leading an empire through war and plague.
His writings weren’t displays of confidence, they were reminders to himself how to stay human amidst pressure.
He didn’t want to become a revered statue.
He wanted to remain a man.
And that’s the paradox.
The more we try to look perfect, the more fragile we become.
Pretending that nothing affects us makes us brittle.
Showing that we’re human; that we have doubts, that we make mistakes, that we sometimes have toddlers barging in mid-presentation makes us trustworthy.
Approachable. Real.
And that’s what builds antifragile teams.
Not sterile professionalism.
Not polished perfection.
But the courage to be human in public.
So next time your life leaks into your work, whether it’s your kid crying, your dog barking, or your face betraying the stress you carry, don’t be ashamed.
You’re not breaking the rules of leadership.
You’re rewriting them.
Stay human.
Recommendations:
This video explains in a simply manner how game theory is involved in how people think and how can we make the world just a bit better.
If you were not convinced exercise is good for you, this study on how exercise can decrease your risk of dying by one third might convince you.
This movie tells the story of Blackberry, that was once the king of smartphones and then collapsed into anonimity. It’s a fascinating insight into how tech companies work.
Thanks for reading.
Stay hungry, stay foolish.
— Leo
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